When I first heard about this book, I was both excited and curious. I really enjoyed the concept of the 5 Love Languages, so I figured that this would also be a great concept. In the end, I was not disappointed. The idea of there being 5 types of apologies, and 5 ways to accept them is revolutionary when it comes to our relationships with others, no matter your age or phase of life you are in. Although I disagree with one of the chapters, I still believe this is a solid resource. I hope they adapt this book to include other phases of life like they did with the books about the love languages. I would recommend it to almost anyone ~ Bethel
Apologizing is one of the hardest things we have to do. Whether it be for small offenses or life-altering mistakes, we all know how hard it is to apologize when we have done something wrong. Sometimes, it’s because we have a hard time admitting that we’ve done something wrong. Other times, we’re afraid that our apology won’t be accepted and the relationship will be stranded. Many of us have experienced the devastation of apologizing, only for that apology to fall on deaf ears and be ignored, even though you apologized the best way you know how. It makes us ask the question: what is the best to apologize to someone I’ve offended?
In the book The Five Apology Languages, authors Gary Chapman and Jennifer Thomas help their readers understand the nature of apologies and forgiveness by breaking down what they call the “five languages of apology”. In a similar way that Gary Chapman explains the five languages of love in his best-selling book series, this author duo brings awareness to the fact that there are several different ways that someone apologizes. These five apology languages are expressing regret, accepting responsibility, making restitution, planned change, and requesting forgiveness. Through an engaging and easy-to-understand presentation, Chapman and Thomas help us see that understanding your apology languages as well as the apology languages of your loved ones will change the dynamic of practically every relationship in your life. Using many biblical principles, his exploration of apology and forgiveness is revolutionary and timely. Including a quiz to help you determine your apology languages as well as tools to help you determine your loved ones’ languages, this is a tool that everyone young and old needs to have at their disposal.
My only criticism of the book is the contents of chapter 11, in which the authors encourage the idea of self-forgiveness. I strongly disagree with this idea. This is because I believe that when a Christian is unable to forgive themselves, they are basically saying that they messed up so bad that they can’t accept Christ’s forgiveness. That is a lie that Satan desperately wants us to believe. Instead of addressing apologies to yourself, you need to address them to God and then fully believe that He has forgiven you. While spending a whole chapter talking about apologizing to yourself, they spend hardly any time discussing apologizing to God when we’ve sinned against Him. I understand that they presented this idea from the perspective of counselors, but to me, this idea is not grounded in good theology.
Aside from my disagreements about self-forgiveness, I still think this is a great book and would recommend it to practically anyone. Get your copy today!
* I received a copy of this book from the publisher for the purpose of this review
If you want to read my review of Gary Chapman's book, The 5 Love Languages (Singles Edition), click here
To read reviews of some other book on the topic of forgiveness, click here
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I was looking forward to reading this book from the first time I heard about it. I have enjoyed all the books I’ve read by Lysa, but have found that her last several books have been personally significant. With each of her last few releases, especially Uninvited, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way, and now Forgiving What You Can’t Forget, her books have proven to become more and more relevant to what I have gone through in my personal life. While each book by itself is powerful, all three books together are a powerful tool for those who have dealt with pain caused by the actions of others. The topic of forgiveness is difficult but is also incredibly freeing, if you choose to embrace it over bitterness. This is now my top resource on this topic. I cannot recommend it enough ~ Bethel
Forgiveness is one of the hardest things Christians are called to do in the Scriptures, especially when they have been hurt deeply by the actions of others. We are well aware of the Scripture’s call to forgive, but we can’t let go of what happened to us. Relationships are destroyed, bitter words are exchanged, and the pain afterwards refuses to let us move on. It often feels like forgiving is letting our offender off the hook, so we are holding ourselves captive to our pain, all while thinking that we are holding our offenders responsible. This leads to a vicious cycle that seems like it will never end. It makes us ask the question: how can I learn to forgive what I can’t forget?
In her book Forgiving What You Can’t Forget, Lysa Terkeurst takes her readers on a journey toward discovering how they can let go of the pain of what others have done to them and learn how to forgive. While not diminishing the pain and suffering they have been through, Lysa walks through many facets of forgiveness, bitterness, and the pain caused by conflicts with others. Instead of offering platitudes of instant solutions, she instead offers hope that with time, diligence, and support, you can make peace with the past and live life again. Speaking with honesty and vulnerability from the pain of her husband having an affair, Lysa shares her personal journey of her husband having an affair, sharing it in a way that makes it relatable, regardless of what you may need to forgive. If you have ever struggled with forgiveness, this is a book you need to read. Get your copy today!
To learn more about how I learned to forgive in the middle of difficult circumstances,
I was both excited and nervous about reading this book. It’s true that Nancy has become one of my favorite authors, but that was the same reason I was nervous. Nancy has an incredible way of breaking down Scripture and biblical truth in such a way that you understand, which is what I needed after having been through several trials that left wounds inflicted by others’ choices. I knew that I needed it. When I started reading it, it was hard to stop, because I needed the message so badly. I found that although I had started to forgive those that hurt me, I still had some bitterness deep down that needed to be brought to the light. I was really able to see the heart of what forgiveness is and what it isn’t. It has become a significant tool in my own healing, as I believe anyone who reads this book will say too. Everyone will be hurt by the actions or words of others in this life, so I truly believe that this book that every single Christian needs to read. I recommend this book to anyone and everyone ~ Bethel
Forgive is a difficult word in our culture today. When we are offended, it is our nature tendency to become anger and bitter, wanting vengeance toward those that hurt us. We desire for those that hurt us to get their comeuppance. All the while, we often in this process take on the tracts that we hate in the person that hurt us and push us further and further from the Lord and the life He has planned for us. Although we want for them to pay for what they did, we are the ones that are held prisoners by our own anger and bitterness. When we are told we need to forgive, so many of us can’t even comprehend it, let alone take the necessary steps to forgive them. It makes us ask the question: How do I learn to forgive those that have hurt me when I have been so deeply hurt?
In her book, Choosing Forgiveness, Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth [published under her maiden name, Nancy Leigh DeMoss] helps her readers break free from the pain and bitterness from those that hurt us by revealing that forgiveness is a choice, not a feeling. After helping her audience to see the consequences when we don’t forgive, Nancy walks us through the many facets of forgiveness through the lens of God’s Word, helping us to see what forgiveness is and what it isn’t. We are reminded that there is no magic words or secret formula to make it easy or automatic, but there are biblical principles that will allow us to find freedom and healing from the pain that comes from bitterness. Through examples in Scriptures as well as illustrations of real life people who experienced the healing power of forgiveness, you will be encouraged, challenged, and inspired to break the chains of holding on to anger or resentment. This book is powerful from cover to cover, theologically packed with truth, and a tool that every Christian should have in their library. Get your copy today!
To check out my review of Nancy's book, Adorned, click here
Lion's Eyes Reviews is a blog dedicated to reviews of Christian books, most of which are non-fiction, but may also occasionally review movies and musicals. It will also feature the work Bethel does to help launch and promote the works of Christian authors.
The name is derived from one of Bethel's favorite books, Through the Eyes of a Lion by Levi Lusko. Through these reviews, Bethel hope to give Christians the tools they need to look at the world "through the eyes of a lion" so they can find the courage to "run toward the roar".
To find the detailed archives of these reviews, you can check them out here:
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Bethel Grove is a Christian young woman who loves to read and write, eat Reese's Peanut Butter Cup Blizzards, and disciple teen girls as a youth leader. What started as a hobby of writing book reviews and doing deep biblical studies eventually led her down the path of self-publishing and helping other Christian authors launch their books. She hopes to someday be a vocational youth minister and well-known author.
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