As I was a part of the launch for their last book a year ago (Love Defined), I heard they were planning on releasing another book this year. But I admit I was surprised when I heard about the topic. Not because I didn’t think they would do a great job, but because it was very closely related to the subject of their last book. Not to mention that I have read many books on the subject over the years, I was curious if they would be able to provide a newer perspective for a generation of young women who don’t want to do when it comes to the subject of biblical sexuality. But in the end, I was not disappointed. What I found I liked the best about the book is that it doesn’t feel like some purity books that are written by older women that give lists of do’s and don’ts. This was written in a friendly tone by sisters who feel like they are your big sisters, trying to help you understand what to do with this confusing topic in an honest and vulnerable way. I am so grateful that that Kristen and Bethany were willing to address this topic, and that they remind us that even though we have all experienced some form of sexual brokenness, God can and will redeem all of it in His time for His glory. If a girl is the right age (see my ratings at the end of the review), this is a book I would definitely recommend ~ Bethel
Purity. It’s made to feel like a dirty word in our culture, because it is something that our culture refuses to honor. And even those of us that try to honor it eventually come to realize that the impurity of the culture around us has seeped into our hearts and minds. We have a hard trying to wrap our minds around the topics of purity and sexuality in a God-honoring way, but we are afraid to ask the questions that will help us find answers and freedom. We are scared that we are the only one that has questions or struggles, so we clam up and are left in fear. It makes us ask the question: how can I learn the truth about God-defined sexuality?
In their newest book, Sex, Purity, and the Longings of a Girls Heart, sisters Kristen Clark and Bethany Beal help us find the beauty and freedom that comes from choosing to pursue God-honoring sexuality. Helping us see that we all have experienced sexual brokenness and struggles with lust, they help us identify where our culture has steered us wrong by identifying four lies about our sexual design and challenging us to replace them with truths from God’s word about the way He designed our sexuality. They offer tools for combating temptations and the battles within your mind and take time to address many specific questions about “hush hush” topics and questions that they asked their readers during a survey. And finally, they help us see that God has help us walk the path of freedom from past and present struggles with our sexuality, helping all of us see that God can redeem anything in His time, including our sexuality, if we choose to walk in faith and surrender to Him. This book is much needed and powerful. It’s the kind of book I wished I had as a teenager. Kristen and Bethany are honest and relevant in their writing style, and have a genuine heart to help girls and women get back to the women God intended them to be. This is a book that I recommend to women and girls about 16 and older. Get your copy today!
*I received a copy of this book from the publisher as part of my involvement in the book's launch team and for the purpose of this review
Teen Rating. The reason I am giving it a lower rating in this category is that I would struggle to recommend this book to a younger teenager. I think that some of the topics discussed could cause a loss of some innocence if she is not to that level of maturity (I am not mentioning these topics by name for concern about teens that may read this review). But at the same time, I do recognize that these topics are completely and totally necessary to discuss. I would recommend it for girls about 16 or older. For teens 15 or younger, I would recommend Bethany and Kristen's last book, Love Defined, as a better starting point for their age
When I first heard they were updating this book as well as the teen counterpart, I was curious about it. But I originally only pursued reviewing Lies Young Women Believe (co-authored by Dannah Gresh). After some time and research, I was excited to discover that they now have a male counterpart (Lies Men Believe by Robert Wolgemuth) and are about to release a pre-teen counterpart too (Lies Girls Believe by Dannah Gresh). Since there are so many other books in the series and the topic is so close to my heart, I decided it was time to read the book that started it all. When I finally started reading it, I couldn’t put it down. Literally. I finished the 300 page book in one night. I found myself in love with Nancy’s sincerity and passion for helping women of all ages be freed from the lies that hold them back from the life God has in store for them. Although there are a few lies I struggle with myself, I also found that through many recent experiences, some of these lies that used to hold me back no longer have a hold in my life. That made reading this book a milestone in my spiritual journey. It has also helped me strengthen my ability to identify lies for what they are so they have be replaced with truth. I am now looking forward to reading more books by Nancy in the future, as well as other books in the series.
In our culture today, we are constantly being fed lies. Lies about ourselves, lies about God, lies about identity and our relationships with others. These are just the beginning of a list that could fill a whole book in its own right. They cause us to live our lives apart from what God has in store for us in light of His truth. Although everyone regardless of age or gender deals with lies, some many of the lies prevalent in our society are directed at women both young and old. So many of the lies we believe can be as a result of deception from our own emotions or our struggles with shame. Either way, it makes us harder for those of us that are trying to lives our lives in light of the truth, when these lies make it difficult to distinguish the truth from the lies. It makes women ask the question: how can I identify and stand up under the lies that I am believing?
In the updated version of the bestselling book, Lies Women Believe, Nancy Demoss Wolgemuth explores many of the lies that women believe so that they can discover the truth that sets from free. Identifying with the first woman to be deceived, Nancy encourages women to identity that the lies they have believed are holding them back from the life God has in store for them. After giving some methods for identifying the lies, Nancy walks through a total of 45 different lies believed by women based on surveys. Some of the lies are ones we wouldn’t necessarily say out loud, but have proven to be believed by many of our actions. She includes sections about lies we believe about God, ourselves, our sin, priorities, marriage, children, emotions, and circumstances. There is also a newly added chapter about sexuality that was written by Dannah Gresh (who co-authored Lies Young Women Believe with Nancy). Nancy discusses the root of these lies and with both love and conviction tells us the truth as it is laid out in God’s word. She doesn’t shy away from the difficulties of addressing these deep-seated lies but instead chooses to help the reader root them out in God’s grace so they can live in the freedom of the truth. At the conclusion, Nancy shares an incredible list of truth to combat the lies she addresses, including Scriptures to help you absorb the truth. I appreciate the honesty and integrity of Nancy to stand up for the truth in a society that struggles to distinguish truth from lies, as well as the heart she has for the women she helps. If you are women, either single or married, either young or old, this is a book worth reading. Get your copy today.
*I received a copy from the publisher for the purpose of this review
Teen Rating. This book might be difficult for a teen to process. Most of the chapters about marriage and children are irrelevant to teens. Although a mature older teen could read this book a get a lot of it, I would recommend Lies Young Women Believe as more relevant alternative. I personally think this book should be reserved for those 18 and older.
To check out my review of the teen version, Lies Young Women Believe, click here
Male-Friendly Rating. Although some of the issues described in here are a little personal, I think that some men, particularly those in ministry, could benefit from at least familiarizing themselves with the lies Nancy discusses. If any men are interested in a version relevant to them, I recommend checking out Lies Men Believe by Robert Wolgemuth
Singles-Friendly Rating. Considering that Nancy was single when she wrote the original version of this book, it is mostly written in such a way as to be relevant to women regardless of their season of life. Although the sections on marriage and children may be a little irrelevant, they are still useful for helping single women understand the struggles of married women. I look forward to rereading those sections if/when I get married
My mom had talked about Chapman’s original book about the five love languages since I was young. But it was only recently that I discovered that there was a version written specifically to single adults. When I found out about it, I was so excited to read it. When I finally got it, I couldn’t put it down. I finished it in two days. These concepts about love languages are something that every person needs to read. But I believe it’s especially significant to learn this in your singles years, because it will build into any future dating relationships and in marriage. I absolutely recommend this to any of my single friends, and for anyone that isn’t single, there is probably an edition of this book written for you. Do a little research and get it. You won’t regret it ~ Bethel
Love is expressed is many different ways, but these expressions don’t always mean the same thing to different people. Something that is meaningful to one person may not be to another. This can make it hard for us to figure out how to best express love. This doesn’t just apply to romantic relationships. This can make things difficult for all relationships: family, friends, coworkers, neighbors, roommates, and the list could go on. It’s so hard to know how to relate well to each other when we struggle to express love in a way that others can relate to. This can seem to be an especially hard struggle for single adults, especially those who haven’t ever been married. It makes us ask the question: how can I learn to love others better as a single adult?
In his book, The 5 Love Languages (Singles Edition), Gary Chapman walks us through the five “languages” in which all human communicate love, and how singles can apply these love languages to all relationships in our lives. Some feel most loved through words of affirmation. Some feel and express love best through receiving or giving gifts. Some feel most loved through acts of service. Some feel loved through spending quality time with those they care about. And some feel and express love best through physical touch. Out of each of these languages, everyone has a primary love language in which makes them feel the most loved. But understanding and learning to communicate all five are important for us to find ways to love others more. Chapman walks through what these love languages look like lived out with parents and siblings, as well as those that may be looking toward romantic relationships in the future. He also talks about relating to roommates, classmates, and coworkers. He even walks through single parents loving their children better. All of this is presented in friendly and relevant writing style that anyone can understand. These truths about love languages are profound, especially in a day and age when we are quick to make things about ourselves. But this book is a great tool to help us reach out beyond our own love language into the other languages so that we can love others the way that Christ did. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is currently single, or anyone who wants to figure out how to relate to singles better. If you don’t fit into those categories, there is probably an edition of this book written for you. Get your copy today!
* I received a copy of this book from the publisher for the purpose of this review
Teen Rating. This book could be read by a teen, but the main reason I am giving this rating is because there is a teen edition of this book that I would recommend they check out before this one. Although it doesn’t discuss anything inappropriate, I personally think this book is better saved for those that are college-age or older
When I first heard that a local church was going to be doing a women’s bible study through this book, I was so excited. Not only had this book been sitting on my shelf for a quite a while waiting to be read, but I was excited to be a part of an adult women’s study for the first time. When you have the opportunity to hear the author reading or quoting their book in their own voice, it makes that message all the more meaning, and that made the videos from the study curriculum the icing on the cake for me. I was blown away by how relevant is book and the topic of rejection is to my life, not just my current circumstances, but throughout my whole life. It was a blessing to go through this book with a great group of women that together learned how to live loved. I would say that this book is relevant to anyone, regardless of their age and their season of life. I highly recommend this book to pretty much anyone ~ Bethel
Rejection. We all hate it. We all struggle with it. We all find ways to avoid facing it now. We all find ways to avoid dealing with the past. From rejection in relationships from rejection in jobs from rejection from our dreams, all of deal with it. But so few of us actually know how to handle it in healthy ways. So many of us get consumed by it to the point that it prevents us from living our lives to the fullest. Even for those of us that follow the Lord, many of us struggle with feeling like God will inevitably reject us like many of the people around us have. This makes it difficult for us to live our lives in light of God’s grace and make it hard for us to love God and love others. We also become all the more susceptible to Satan’s lies about our identity that can steal our joy, our faith, and our future. It makes us ask the question: Is a constructive and God-honoring way to handle rejection?
In her book Uninvited, Lysa TerKeurst helps to see that there is a way to process rejection so that even when we face, we can still live loved in the light of God’s grace. Lysa acknowledges that all of us have or will face rejection at some point in our lives, so that we need to honestly admit when we struggle with it. From many personal stories as well as relevant biblical narratives, Lysa helps us see many aspects of rejection, some that we may have never thought of as part of rejection. But we are reminded that even when it seems like the world has cast us aside, that is not what God is doing to us. He is using the difficulties of our circumstances to set us apart. We are reminded even when rejection seems to run us dry, the Lord can and will fill us up in His time, if we turn to Him. We are also reminded that Jesus chose to take the rejection of mankind onto Himself so that we don’t have to be bound by our circumstances. When we are able to embrace that, then we are able to live loved, even when we face rejection. This book is written in a friendly and relevant tone that anyone can find accessible. Lysa speaks powerfully from the wisdom of her own experience as well as integrating that well with truth from God’s word. I recommend this book to anyone young or old, male or female, especially if you struggle with rejections, past or present. Get your copy today!
Male-Friendly Rating. Although this book was written with adult women in mind, I really think that men can gain a lot from reading this book. It is written in such a way that it nothing inappropriate for men is discussed. In fact, some of the endorsements for the book are written by a few of favorite male authors (Bob Goff and Jefferson Bethke).
Singles-Friendly Rating. I added this rating to this book because, although it is not a relationship book specifically, many women in their singleness struggle with rejection because they’ve lost a relationship or they’ve never been in one before. I know this book personally helped me in this area. I think this book is a must read for single women
When I first heard that sisters Kristen and Bethany were releasing another book, I was so excited. Since I was on the launch team for their first book, Girl Defined, I knew that this was a book I did not want to miss. I was excited to be accepted onto the launch team for this book as well. Although recent circumstances in my life prevented me from being prepared for the book’s launch day on May 1, I was so compelled when I finally got around to listening to the audiobook version. I basically listened to it straight through. When it comes to explaining the ins and out of singleness, marriage, and everything that comes in between, these sisters have you covered. I once again enjoyed the balanced perspectives of Kristen, who’s married, and Bethany, who was single at the time of writing the book. They are very understandable and relatable in their writing style and in their desire to help women everywhere to pursue God’s plan for finding lasting love. This is a book I would highly recommend ~ Bethel
The methods that our culture tries to present us for finding and maintaining lasting relationships are not working. Everything from infatuation disguised as love to sex before marriage to everything magically working itself out in marriage, Hollywood has tried to convince us this is the recipe for success and societal acceptance. But when you look carefully at the lives of those pursuing those methods, their lives are less than perfect. In fact, the statistics for divorce, abortion, and STDs are higher than ever before, but society won’t admit it because their methods are working. They continues to deceive us into a vicious cycle of infatuation and feelings that always results in our hearts getting broken, but we always go back to the same method. It leads many women to ask the question: How can I pursue God honoring relationships with guy, regardless of what season of life I’m in?
In their book Love Defined, sisters Kristen Clark and Bethany Baird of Girl Defined Ministries help us discover the ways that we can pursue God-honoring relationships that led to God-honoring marriages, all while giving hope that God has a plan and purpose for those of us that are single. They help us identify our culture’s “fairytale façade” and “Merry-Go-Round” method for satisfying relationships. They lead you to see that following these methods will result in disappointment and brokenness if we continue to rely on them. Instead, they offer a perspective on love, sex, and romance that is radically fresh and truly fulfilling when compared to our culture’s methods. To counter our culture’s methods, they offer a method to approach relationships that puts God in the center and won’t leave you broken, even if it doesn’t work out. Bethany also takes time to watch through the struggles of singleness, but offer advice on how to live your single years well while learning to be satisfied in Jesus. Kristen also walks through her relationship with her husband, and how they involved God in the process of their relationship. Together they address big questions like how to be just friends with guys, if you should date a non-Christian, or warning signs that its time to end a relationship. They conclude with a challenge to live our love defined by God, regardless of what phrase of life you are in. These sisters are a dynamic pair as teachers and writers, and they will inspire you to redefine what you know about romance from God’s perspective. Get your copy today!
*I received a copy of this book from the publisher for the purpose of this review, as part of my involvement in the book’s launch team
To read my review of their first book, Girl Defined, click here
To read my last post (which explains the recent circumstances in my life), click here
Living in the Redemption of the price Jesus paid for you and me.
My name is Bethel, and welcome to my site, Princess Worth Dying For, where I hope to share Christian reviews, Christian Spoken Word, and a Christian Insights on everything from modesty to musicals. My main focus on this blog is book reviews, and the main focus of my YouTube channel is spoken word, but I do crossover work with both.
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